I started blogging 3 years ago mostly to help promote my Etsy shop and spread the word about my handmade jewelry. I had a dream and I wanted to go all the way with it. But aside from that, I wanted a place to express myself; somewhere that I could say whatever was on my mind and just get it all out.
Soon I found communities of “mommy bloggers” {I only use this term because they were so much different than the crafty bloggers that I was accustomed to} and found a place to connect with other moms. Of course the wonderful world of reviews was soon brought to my attention and I was quite intrigued. I asked a million and one questions, found a lot of answers and finally dived in full force.
It didn’t take long before my blog became more reviews than crafty and personal stuff. I didn’t want my dream to get lost in the shuffle and I also didn’t like the mix of craft, review and personal stuff on what started as a blog to help promote my new company. I needed something new. I wanted to start a new blog for the personal posts and reviews, and keep the old one strictly professional; for promotional use, but still with a touch of me.
This is where a new dream began. I started thinking of names for a blog, something original that would stand out and set me aside from the rest. I thought Me & My Boys sounded great at first and even began as that; for just a very short time. Soon Outnumbered 3 to 1 just popped in my head and it stuck. It was perfect, because at the time I was outnumbered by those crazy boys who changed my life and stole my heart.
I started promoting my butt off, connecting with brands, my readers and other bloggers. Promotion was like a whole new job in itself, but it was so worth it because I saw the numbers growing so rapidly. This new dream was just taking off and it was great, so much greater than I at first thought it would be. I had built a ton of relationships and had the chance to review some pretty awesome stuff. It felt so great to be noticed by big brands and PR.
But soon that old dream I had faded away and got lost in the shuffle. I was no longer making jewelry like I had been and certainly not keeping up on that blog, or even promoting my shop for that matter. It all went on the back burner.
Soon my email was overloaded with pitches and I was turning them down left and right because I simply couldn’t do every single one. Then I had an idea. What if I brought in more writers to do some of these reviews. I could take them under my wing in a sense and teach them everything I know, help them learn the ropes and build relationships with brands and help to build their following so that they could eventually take their blog to that next level. This might also give me more time to spend on my jewelry making. It sounded perfect!
So I put it all out there and ended up with so many more responses than I could have dreamed possible! How was I going to narrow it down to just one new writer? After weeks of back and forth emails as well as my own little system of notes, I finally narrowed it down to four people. I couldn’t choose just one from them all, so brought them all on. Aside from new people to help review stuff, these ladies brought in weekly recipes, crafts and deals. We also had a baby reviewer on the team which was great because I was flooded with baby pitches!
All was well, but then life got in the way of that. My dad suddenly got sick, died a week later and my whole world shattered. I not only lost one of the most important men in my life, but I had to worry about what my teenage siblings would do. My brothers lived with my dad and their relationship with my mom is rocky to say the least. We offered our home to them, if they wanted it. They made their decision to live with us the day before the funeral. I was glad to have them because I love them, but I knew I was in for the biggest fight of my life. My mom is stubborn and she wouldn’t give up that easily. Everything has to be all about her and in her eyes, I was taking her kids; even though they are old enough to know what they want and in this case don’t want.
Aside from that, we needed a bigger place. A 2 bedroom just wasn’t cutting it with 7 people and 3 dogs. My family came to the rescue and our house search began. We’d find something out of the city and we’d start fresh; a whole new life for a newly blended family. However, our search wasn’t quite that easy. We had a budget and our wants/needs overshot that so it was kind of hard finding something. We were always looking for a fixer upper, but it had to have enough room or at least enough potential for room for us all. We needed at least 3 bedrooms and a potential fourth. That isn’t exactly common, especially within our budget.
After about a month and a half of searching, we finally found this one, but it was completely gutted. We had a lot of work on our hands, but also had to wait a whole month to close on the house! We really loved this house though, so we endured another month in that tiny little house. I’m surprised nobody went insane during that time!
The month came and went and we finally got the keys. It was so exciting at first, but then it seemed the work would never end. After a month, we had the whole back of the house {living room, kitchen, dining, bathroom, 3 bedrooms} done and were finally able to move in. We’d do the rest as we lived here. We got a lot done, but there’s still so much more to do and no budget left. So now we’re just slowly doing things as we can and as we have extra money. For the record, I’m still without a bedroom.
But all this time, for 9 months now; I haven’t fully put 100% into this blog. I just haven’t had the time to put what was needed into this. I was so busy with my dad being sick; then mourning his loss, trying to bring two families together and keep everyone as happy as they could be. I had to hide my tears so many times just so that everyone else didn’t get sad. Then we were house hunting for what seemed forever, packing our stuff and finally the endless remodeling. Now I’ve been on a job hunt for what seems like forever, with no leads in site. I want office or even factory, but don’t have much experience in the actual work force, so I may just end up having to work in a store.
Somewhere along this long crazy road, I feel like I kind of lost myself. When I blog now, it’s all work and that’s it. I haven’t shared much besides reviews in months and I feel like this is starting to become nothing but a cyber advertisement. I want my outlet back and I just don’t know what to do or how to gain it back. There’s just not enough time in the day for everything that I need to do. I’m really worried how I’ll keep up once I do go back to work. I feel like I’m going to lose it all and all of those dreams I once had are going to come crashing down on me, just like my jewelry did. I’ve got to find a better way to balance it all. There’s got to be a way and I’ve just got to find it.
Aside from that, I feel lost personally too in a way. We moved 35 minutes away, which really isn’t that far. The Man actually used to work 5 minutes away from our current house and made this drive from the city every single day. He still does drive it almost every day when he’s working in that area, which is funny because he always wanted jobs closer to the house when we lived there and now that we don’t he gets calls from around there all the time! But to all of our friends and family, this is “out of town” and we’re too far to visit; although it wasn’t too far when they all wanted to bring their boats to the lake.
So much has just changed in the past 9 months, personally, professionally, every aspect of my life. I’m trying to find myself again, but where do I even begin? Maybe I’m searching for someone who isn’t even there anymore. So much has changed in my life, maybe I changed as well. Who knows. I just want to at least find some of that old normal again.
